Let me count the ways that Verizon sucks…if I can count that high

September 10, 2008 · Comments

Right now, I don’t care when FIOS is coming. They couldn’t pay me to add another Verizon service. Life is too short.

So to recap…we moved on August 27th. That is the day the 2 phone numbers we had in our home were supposed to be switched to our new address.

  • On August 27th, tech spends 5 hours in my home and can’t get a single thing working. She does manage to install the one extra jack we asked for. But no service.
  • August 30th, second tech visit. This time he manages to get the main number working but still can’t do a thing for the 2nd line. Shortly after he leaves I realize that the 1st technician misconfigured 2 of the existing jacks (couldn’t test tech #1 without working phone lines).
  • Realizing the nightmare that was unfolding, I canceled my order for Verizon DSL and switched to Comcast. So glad I did.
  • September 2nd, third tech visit. Still can’t find the 2nd line, but he fixes the mistake I noticed from the first visit.
  • September 3rd, 4th tech visit. This guy is some sort of specialist and he fixes the 2nd line. Turns out it was mis-labeled in the box on the street.
  • Somewhere in the above I realize that calls to our old phone numbers were not forwarding to the new ones. Another call to fix.
  • I configured the voicemail service on September 2nd, but didn’t bother to test it. My mistake. This morning, it dawned on me that we haven’t received any messages since we moved in. I call the home phone from my cell. It rings 5 times and then goes to a busy signal. Another frustrating phone call to Verizon to find out that the only solution is for him to completely remove voicemail from my account and then it can be added again later today/tomorrow. Something broke when it was added the first time. Won’t be active until at least Friday (9/12) and if not, I’ll have to call repair according to the guy I just spoke to. Just turned on the native answering system on the phone I have here, which is what I should have done instead of expecting Verizon to handle one thing properly.
  • My mom tells me that the Caller ID shows someone else’s name on her phone. It’s correct when I try from here, but it shows the wrong name when I call outside the local area. Presumably it’s the person who had this phone number before me. Verizon’s explanation? Well, it may take up until 6 months until Caller ID shows the correct name for everyone. “If after a few weeks it bothers you that much, you can just change your number. You just moved so you’re not too attached to that number yet, right?” Yes, that is a direct quote of what I was just told. No, it doesn’t bother me at all that I call friends and family and a total stranger’s name appears on their caller ID. No, I don’t want to block my name/number because it then makes it more difficult to get through to people. I just want my last name to appear on the caller ID. Apparently too much to ask. Unreal.

I have placed no less than 10 calls to Verizon over the last 2 weeks. In at least half of those calls someone tries to upsell me to DSL or some other deal. Not even if you beg as if your life depended on it. I have written down names. I have spoken to supervisors. No one cares. They know as well as I do that if I want landline phone service, I’m going to excuse every mistake, accept every inconvenience and pay my bill each month for the honor.

Eric and I both have Phone Fusion accounts and I still have my Grand Central number. Those are the numbers we give out, so it could be worse.

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